Smells fishy

Annabel Karmel, you make my life hard. As a Mum, not only am I meant to be devoted to my little people with no regard for my own sanity, but I am also expected to cook; to a decent level no less. Every week I peruse the recipes on the ‘Made for Mums’ website to get inspiration for what I am going to batch cook that week for everyone in the house. Every week results in a different style of disaster. This week is fish pie.


A ha! I think when I see the recipe. I already have a frozen fish pie mix from my over-excited visit to ASDA. It’s all so cheap. ‘Only a paaaannnnd’ I keep saying to myself as I pile the trolley high. So high in fact that the girlies were able to reach back from their seats and grab whatever took their fancy. Generally squishable items. Bread is a firm (but maliable) favourite.
So, I’m looking at my ASDA frozen PIE mix instructions. Except there’s no mention of pie. You cook it in a tin foil parcel with strict instructions not to reheat. Okaaaay. Look at Fish Pie recipe for toddlers. No mention of frozen fish. Agh! What now? I’ve got to rebel – figure out my own combination of recipes. I have done this many times in my past. My ‘A La Lucinda menu’ I call it. But in those days it didn’t matter too much if I gave myself food poisoning. A day off work and a little closer to my target weight isn’t such a bad thing. Could be worse. Bit different now mind. If I give myself food poisoning I STILL have to look after my 18 month old twins. If I give THEM food poisoning I’m up to my sinuses in bodily fluids…and solids. Far less appealing.
I put Classic FM on (makes me feel a bit classy like ‘Hannibal’ (Annabel Cannibal?!?) but without the human organ consuming) and I cook the frozen fish as per instructions. Turns out it’s not actually cooked. This is a good thing right as the recipe requires fish that is neither cooked nor frozen. Now it matches. *punches air* Make the roux. It’s a bit pink (instructions said shallot and I went red onion). One day one of my executive decisions will pay off and everyone will wonder why they never followed my ideas.

Mmmmmm!

La roux. “I’m going in for the kill…”

Mashed potato is a bit lumpy. I ignored recent advice to use a potato ricer. It’s just adding a whole load of washing up to my day. Put fish in ramekins (another irritation Annabel – go big or go home.). Pour roux over the top. Spill the roux…obviously in the 2mm gap between the cooker and the worktop. FFS! Plonk mash on top. Break egg into bowl (bits of shell fall in too, obvs). Brush pies with ‘lightly’ beaten egg. How do you know if you’ve lightly or heavily beaten it?!? Bake for 25 mins. Meanwhile pour a glass of Prosecco and nuke myself a Weight Watchers microwavable Chicken Hotpot. It only takes 7 minutes, it’s now 8.20pm and I’m famished.

'Unfortunate' doesn't even cover it.

‘Unfortunate’ doesn’t even cover it.

It’s finished!!! Girlies, you lucky little tikes. Look what you’ve got for dinner tomorrow. I can’t get too cocky – it’s 50/50 if they’ll eat it. Plus, there are two of them, so it’s 50/50 TWICE. So that’s, erm… Oooh, that makes my head hurt. Perhaps another glass of Prosecco would help.
Just want to point out that the recipe is called ‘Family Fish Pie’, but it is actually for 4 small pies (plural). Got that wrong didn’t ya Annabel! Tired and frazzled twin mum – ONE. Incredibly successful entrepreneur Mum of 3 – NIL. 😀 Although she does actually seem quite lovely. Perhaps I should have chosen Martha Stewart – bit easier to be critical of someone who has ‘done bird’…and I don’t mean a roast chicken.

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7 comments

  1. Kate · July 29, 2015

    Hello. Much easier fish pie recipe. Take two packets of AsdA frozen fish pie mix and defrost them, put them In large baking dish and pour over one cup of frozen corn and one cup of frozen peas. In a microwaveable jug tip in one large 300g tub Philadelphia cream cheese with 200ml milk and 100g grated cheese. Put into the microwave for 1 Minute then stir, repeat until all the cheese has melted and it can be mixed together to form a roux. Pour over the fish and mix all together. Put the mash on top baste with egg and bake for 30 minutes in 190 degrees.

    Like

  2. Michaela Mocilanova · July 30, 2015

    LOVE this one; good job my lovely

    Michaela

    Liked by 1 person

  3. TwinMumAmongstOtherThings · July 30, 2015

    Thank you Kate. Who knew that you could microwave Philadelphia?!? That sounds super-quick and simple, which is always a good thing for twin mum types. 🙂

    Like

  4. Lifeloveanddirtydishes · July 31, 2015

    “go big, or go home” classic. Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics

    Liked by 1 person

  5. helen gandy · July 31, 2015

    Haha. Awesome. Sounds like a lot of effort, put ya feet up and grab a take away menu and dial hehe.

    #binkylinky

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Twinmumanddad (@Twinmumanddad) · August 1, 2015

    It looks good, but I have to be honest and say we use a lot of convenience foods! Thanks for linking up to the #BinkyLinky

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Nige Higgins · August 1, 2015

    It’s sounds wonderful but as a dad of twins we do use a lot of covienence foods thanks for linking to the Binkylinky

    Liked by 1 person

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